Arguments descend into trivialities. Trivialities descend into miscommunications. We are each making efforts, we are both on each other’s team, seeking earnestly for the best outcome in good faith. We want this to last. We want this to work. But we’re hurt. But we’re human, and let’s face it: criticism sucks.
So let’s stop getting worked up and get to the core of how we’re feeling: disrespected, unappreciated, or not listened to. It’s true that occasionally we won’t measure up, that our best measurements of our best expressions will pale in comparison to the expectations we’ve established for a dynamic romantic enterprise.
We will get let down. We will be unkind. We will be impatient. We will be thoughtless and act selfishly. We will forget when we shouldn’t and sometimes remember when we should forget. We will be tired and hangry and “Look, I’m just not feeling it right now, okay? Can we just go to bed?”
Together we are climbing a steep, steep mountain, with uneven rocks and uncertain outcomes, just trying to make the best of the equipment we’ve got, which isn’t a lot, and keep the faith despite the rocks, and promote the best, most gosh darn-amazing love we can imagine. Firey and deeply connected.
But our scenes are unscripted, so it’s no surprise we slip up and hurt those we love most, even with the best of intentions.
In sum, I’m sorry. I’m human. Let’s make hot chocolate, cuddle, and watch scary movies on Netflix.